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"In my heart, I think a woman has two choices: either she's a feminist or a masochist." --Gloria Steinem
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May
9
When Good People Do Nothing
Filed Under WOC issues, discrimination, feminism, misogyny, patriarchy, race and racism, rape and sexual assault, violence against women and girls | Posted by Cara | 1 Comment
VERY STRONG TRIGGER WARNING
The story of Romona Moore’s murder is horrific, not only because of the terrifying brutality involved, but because of the terrifying apathy that allowed it to occur. Moore is dead because she and those who tried to help her were ignored. It’s a really shitty consolation, but the very least we can do, to pay attention now. If you think your mental health can handle it, I urge you to please read the full story.
You know, I’m one of those feminists who thinks that racism is indeed a feminist issue, just like poverty, homophobia, transphobia, ableism, and much more are feminist issues, simply because these are factors that oppress women on a daily basis and prevent them from living lives freely, safely and to their full potential. I’m sad that so many seem to disagree — but even if you do disagree on the basis outlined above, I don’t know how anyone could read Romona Moore’s story and not see how racism is a feminist issue, when racism is allowing and assisting the unspeakably violent rape, torture and murder of black women. As for the lawsuit, I hope like hell that her mother wins it.
The failure of authorities to care about the unexplained disappearance of a black woman is not an isolated incident. Not by a long shot. And neither is average people failing to do the right thing when given the chance.
All that is needed for the triumph of evil is for good people to do nothing.
There are many reasons that people do nothing, and sometimes they are justified. It may be believed (often very rightly) that doing the “right thing” will result in more violence or more severe consequences than turning a blind eye. Sometimes one’s own life is on the line. But I don’t see that this was the case here, either for the police officers that refused to even open an investigation, or for the man — probably numerous men — who saw Moore after she had been tortured raped and was probably about half-dead, and did nothing. Not even an anonymous phone call . . . that is, not before it was too late.
I read stories like these, and I find myself wondering where the hell the good people who do something are. And sometimes I wonder how “good” we can really call the people to do nothing. SAFER has an excellent post about bystander training and learning to be the person who does something. Despite our hunches and hopes for ourselves, I don’t think that any of us truly know if we are that person until put in the position. But at the very least, I want to believe that we can learn from the fatal mistakes of others.
Story via What About Our Daughters?
Popularity: 1% [?]
May
8
Walking Out a Rapist
Filed Under Europe, International, human rights, media, misogyny, objectification, patriarchy, rape and sexual assault, sex and sexuality, sex work, sexual exploitation and harassment, violence against women and girls | Posted by Cara | 20 Comments
Did anyone doubt that my first post back would be about a rape-related issue that is considered “controversial”? If not, you know me well.
. . . Well, almost.
You see, the British Home Office has released this campaign to fight the sex trafficking industry — and from what I can tell, I love the concept (I have a practical criticism later). But, nowhere can I find the full text on the poster or an image large enough to make out the small text myself. As the Home Office has received my criticism before for some pretty terrible anti-rape ads, I’d like to know the full text before I sing its praises. If you find it, please send it on! I’ll be looking for it over the next few days; just be aware that my opinion is subject to change or expand on that basis. But here’s what we know:
Posters will appear in clubs and pubs from Monday warning men against paying for sex in brothels with exploited or trafficked women.
The posters, which will be piloted in men’s toilets in Westminster and Nottingham, will say “Walk in a Punter. Walk out a Rapist”.
They are part of a six-month home office review into tackling the demand for prostitution, which began in January, and aim to point out that trafficked women are forced into selling sex, and that forced sex is rape.
“So if you pay for sex with a trafficked woman what does that make you?” the posters ask.
They also urge Johns “if [they're] man enough” to call Crime Stoppers if they come across something suspicious.
Popularity: 5% [?]
May
4
As I suggested I might, I’ll be taking a short break this week. Just a few days, and I’ll still be around moderating comments and such. In fact, taking time off from writing may give me a chance to finally get caught up on my blog reader and to go through the news for what is honestly the first time in a week.
Popularity: 8% [?]
May
4
LGBT Equality and Justice Day 2008
Filed Under LGBTQ issues, activism, excursions, feminism, human rights, legislation, politics | Posted by Cara | 2 Comments
My apologies that I didn’t get to this sooner, but I’ve been alternately busy and dealing with various personal shit. I can’t say that it has been the best week. But even though my memory is slightly less clear than it was when I should have written the post, I did still want to write about Equality and Justice Day.
Popularity: 8% [?]
May
3
On “Real Rape” and Rape Apologists
Filed Under assholes, blogging, feminism, misogyny, patriarchy, rape and sexual assault, violence against women and girls | Posted by Cara | 59 Comments
Rev. Stuart Campbell sent me this email in response to this post about Johnny Vegas:
Sexual harrassment
…is what you will doubtless describe this email at, since you seem to be on only the remotest of nodding terms with your marbles. However, I do urge you with the greatest of sincerity to reconsider your approach to what you incredibly damagingly describe as “feminism”. I have no idea whatever of your personal circumstances beyond the comments you make on your blog, but it appears that you’ve suffered some kind of sexual assault short of rape, but desperately wish to channel the anger of those who have been raped.
I have no desire to minimise whatever you suffered, but as someone who’s worked with several rape victims I find this behaviour deeply troubling, and rather more importantly know it to be greatly counter-productive in terms of attitudes to women. Perhaps things are different in America, where it appears to be widely acceptable to call for the murder of abortion-clinic doctors and the like, and adopt a rather cavalier approach to human life in general, but in the rather more rational environment of the rest of Western society your attitude only serves to encourage and empower misogyny and the trivialisation of all forms of sexual violence by portraying genuine victims as hysterical exaggerators. Your attitude to debate, rather astonishingly in the circumstances, only makes your position even weaker.
Regards,
Rev. S. Campbell
If Campbell actually has worked with rape victims, I offer those victims my greatest sympathies and hope that they find the actual help they need.
Popularity: 23% [?]
May
2
Blogging Against Disablism
Filed Under blogswarm, disability, discrimination, feminism, reproductive justice, violence against women and girls | Posted by Cara | 1 Comment
I’m very sorry that I missed Blogging Against Disablism Day, yesterday. I’m even more sorry that I don’t have much of anything to say on the subject right now.
I would like to note that less than a year ago, I didn’t know a damn thing about the disability rights movement. I was only vaguely aware of its existence. Blogs — and this is perhaps the thing that I love most about the blogosphere and what it can do when at its best — opened my eyes. I’m exceedingly far from being an expert on disability rights now. But I have done some research. I read more than one disability rights blog regularly. I’ve struggled to overcome a lot of my own prejudices in that time. Which is precisely why it amazes me that I wrote this post last year — Disability Rights Are a Feminist Issue — and still agree with it now. I’m glad and a bit relieved to say that I can recommend your reading it.
A few things I didn’t note in that post that I would like to note now:
If feminists believe in reproductive justice, disabled or not, we must be particularly concerned for the rights of people with disabilities. Their reproductive rights are in some of the greatest danger, and we really need to work to overcome our own prejudices on that matter and recognize that reproductive justice is for everyone, not just some. The problems with the pro-choice movement are precisely why the term reproductive justice was coined, and if we’re going to use it in a way that is more than mere appropriation, we need to recognize that attitudes towards the reproductive rights of those with disabilities was and still is one of those problems.
We also must be particularly concerned for the rights of people with disabilities if we care about violence against women. Women with disabilities are much more likely than women without disabilities to be sexually assaulted. Women with disabilities also have a much higher rate of being victims of intimate partner violence.
And really, if we just care about women, if we care about feminism, we should care about the rights of those with disabilities. Women are a large part of the disabled community, and they face discrimination on a daily basis in terms of medical care, housing, employment, the right to make personal decisions and much more. Women with disabilities are women. We are feminists, and may have disabilities ourselves. It is our job to fight legal and social systems that prevent women from the opportunity to live happy, safe and free lives. The argument for why disability rights are a feminist issue really is that simple.
Diary of a Goldfish has the roundup from the blogswarm. It’s holds a huge amount of posts and is full of great bloggers, so I strongly encourage you to read through it. For more on the intersection of feminism and disability activism, I couldn’t more strongly recommend F.R.I.D.A. as a source to add to your blog readers.
Popularity: 10% [?]
May
1
Rape Jokes Taken To Whole New Level
Filed Under Europe, International, assholes, misogyny, patriarchy, pop culture, rape and sexual assault, sexual exploitation and harassment, violence against women and girls | Posted by Cara | 47 Comments
UPDATE: The Guardian has removed O’Hara’s blog post about the Johnny Vegas incident and Vegas has filed a complaint. This does not surprise me, actually, as Britain has very strong libel laws and the post called the actions “sexual assault” in the title even though he was not charged or convicted of anything. Personally, I don’t think that this means the incident did not happen. The facts are supposed to be in dispute, but this will be the case with any crime. Again, I’ve seen no one dispute the sexual assault — I have seen disputes over whether or not penetrative rape took place. I also haven’t found a statement from Vegas about the incident, a statement from the woman who was allegedly assaulted, or a statement from O’Hara in defense or retraction of her article.
Of course, I feel that I made it clear in the blog post that he has been neither charged nor convicted of any crime. And I stand by everything I said, in the context of an opinion about what the nature of these actions would be if they occurred, and so long as its recognized that the opinion on this specific instance was based off of an eye-witness account that was corroborated and printed in a major international newspaper. I am reopening comments, but will absolutely close them again if things get out of hand like they did last time.
Warning: I personally found this to be very upsetting and triggering.
Popularity: 31% [?]
Apr
29
Uh, so I set up wordpress to post this for my yesterday . . . and it totally didn’t.
I will be gone all day — and I do mean all day – for Equality and Justice Day in Albany. It’s the lobbying day for LGBT issues and I’m excited to be a part of it, especially since some cool stuff will be going on. But it does mean that I’ll be gone from 4 in the morning to sometime around 10 at night.
I probably won’t get the chance to check back in until Wednesday evening, since I’m busy that day too. I’ll be speaking on my first-ever panel at a fundraising conference about the work I’ve been doing online with Planned Parenthood, and probably a bit about my blogging, as well. Not a big deal, but public speaking always freaks me out — especially when the people I’m talking to get to talk back!
I’ll probably be exhausted by the time I return . . . but hopefully I’ll have something interesting to report.
I am exhausted, and I do plan on writing a post about yesterday and getting it up this evening. See you then.
Popularity: 10% [?]
Apr
28
Feminist News and Links
Filed Under blogging, feminism, media, random | Posted by Cara | 20 Comments
I’ve been pretty busy, lately. Here’s some stuff I won’t get the time to blog about in depth:
With regards to the Seal Press boycott, many have asked “but what are feminist authors to do?” Prof Black Woman answers that question with a list of kick-ass feminist and multicultural printing presses.
Lauredhel goes after one of my biggest pet peeves: the media referring to rape, particularly child rape, as “sex”.
An Austrian man admittedly kept his daughter prisoner for 24 years — slightly more time than I’ve been alive — continually raped her and impregnated her (at least) seven times. Horrific.
I keep forgetting to mention this hilarity: many anti-abortion opponents do not support the latest bid to outlaw abortion in South Dakota. They feel that because of the unworkable “exceptions” for rape, incest and health, the bill doesn’t go far enough. Let’s hope the asshats manage to bring themselves down.
Maybe we should be more concerned about the fact that Vanity Fair has no problem with sexualizing 15-year-old girls in their magazine and what that says about adults, rather than whether or not it will cause teenage girls to run off and join some kind of crazy promiscuous porn circus? (And maybe wonder when the fuck Annie Leibovitz went from shooting the most iconic magazine cover of all time to just shooting racist and sexist smut?) Just a thought.
Don’t forget to Wear Red on Wednesday.
The U.S. marine accused of raping a 14-year-old Japanese girl is facing court martial.
Professional tool Marc Rudov calls himself a “feminist,” says that women say “‘I do’ at the alter and ‘I don’t’ in the bedroom”. I wonder why women hate him so much?
Racist attacks on Obama get even worse.
The Feminist Art Project is promoting feminist art/exhibitions throughout the country. In related news, there is A Day of Collaborative Performance in the Bronx next month, and participants are needed.
Tigtog gives an important warning to those who use wordpress.com to host their blogs. If that’s you, this is a must-read.
Also, last chance to get your nominations into the Carnival Against Sexual Violence.
What have you been reading? Feel free to shamelessly self-promote.
Popularity: 14% [?]
Apr
27
Oh No They Didn’t
Filed Under education and schools, fun, media, pop culture, random, religious fanaticism | Posted by Cara | 8 Comments
You know that stupid Ben Stein movie Expelled, that argues in favor of “intelligent design” and chastises the sane for not allowing religious bullshit to be taught in science classes? Apparently, they used the John Lennon song Imagine in the film . . . without permission.
Yoko Ono, one of my all-time favorite feminists, isn’t having any of that shit. The issue came to her attention when bloggers started accusing her of selling out. And so she slapped the filmmakers with a lawsuit.
Popularity: 16% [?]
Apr
26
Faulty Feminist Introspection
Filed Under feminism, misogyny, patriarchy, rape and sexual assault, sex and sexuality, sexual exploitation and harassment, slut-shaming, violence against women and girls | Posted by Cara | 17 Comments
Will someone tell me what the fuck this shit is?
A study has concluded that men often “misinterpret” women’s subtle messages during a sexual encounter when the message means “stop”. But my WTF is not towards the study, which is nonetheless very interesting to talk about — my outrage is at the blog post from Broadsheet (emphasis mine).
Now, for the ear steam: I think it’s unfair to blame this sexual miscommunication on men. Just as men are misreading women’s indirect resistance, women are miscalculating how men will interpret their cues to slow down or stop. (Interestingly enough, in previous research, Motley found that women use indirect messages of resistance to avoid upsetting men, but most men easily accept direct resistance.) I also find it hard to blame men for not correctly reading women’s indirect resistance; women are often expected to, in the very least, put on a halfhearted performance as the steadfast sexual gatekeeper — even if it’s clear that she ultimately intends to abandon her post for the night. Given that cultural script — first she resists, then she consents — how is it any surprise that a guy would misinterpret a woman’s subtle suggestions to slow down?
What. The. Fuck.
Of course, the commenters think that it’s the best damn thing since sliced bread.
When Clark-Flory began this post with anger for the concept of “faulty male introspection,” I was with her. The idea sounded pretty damn offensive to me, too. What, guys are just too stupid to talk to women and ask what they mean when unsure? Women are a whole different species that we can’t expect men to actually communicate with? It’s not that he’s sexually assaulting you, ladies, it’s that he has faulty male introspection.
But no. That’s not what she was mad about. She was mad because it placed all the blame on guys. Due to ambiguous writing, I’m not even sure if she merely thinks that women need to take some of the blame, or if she thinks men should be entirely off the hook.
Popularity: 21% [?]
Apr
25
A Crazy 24 Hours
Filed Under WOC issues, books, feminism, media, race and racism | Posted by Cara | 14 Comments
I’ve been waiting to weigh in on the latest of the Amanda Marcotte controversies: the images in the book. I’m not going to rehash it all here; if you don’t know what I’m talking about, click the link because Holly explains it all.
I haven’t read the book or even seen it in person. So, I was unaware of the images. As for my opinion, I agree with everything that Holly and everyone else who was outraged had to say. I noted my shock and disgust in the comments. And I didn’t anticipate writing anything about it unless there were developments.
There have been. Both Amanda and Seal Press have issued apologies.
And though I’m happy that they realize they’ve done something wrong, the apologies themselves do bring up a hell of a lot of questions.
Popularity: 19% [?]