A law that allows domestic violence leave in Florida went into effect at the beginning of this month. This leave includes time to seek medical attention, counseling or to take legal action.
First of all, I think it’s pretty shocking that we don’t already have national laws like this one. This is a prime lesson for all of those victim-blamers out there who like to ask “why doesn’t she just leave?” In addition to the psychological manipulation and financial dependency on your abuser, your boss can apparently fire you because you when you don’t show up to work because you’re busy fleeing to a domestic violence shelter and praying that your abuser doesn’t find you.
Secondly, though this law sounds like a good thing, it is actually full of shocking holes that render it completely useless to a whole range of women. One great feature is that all of the information about the domestic violence situation must be kept confidential. Here are the rest of the not so great features:
Victims of domestic violence can take up to three days’ leave from work under legislation that went into effect July 1 in Florida.
. . .
The law applies to employers with 50 or more employees and to employees who have been at the job three or more months.
Before receiving the leave, the employee must first exhaust all annual or vacation, personal and sick leave unless the employer waives the requirement, the law says. The leave may be with or without pay, at the employer’s discretion.
Except in cases of imminent danger, the employee must provide the employer with “appropriate” advance notice and sufficient documentation of domestic violence, according to the law.
Holy fucking shit. Three days? That’s leave? Three fucking days? That’s enough time for your psychological counseling? To find a new place to live? To obtain a restraining order? Three days? That’s disgusting.
Let’s see, what else? Oh, if you’re new to your job, you can’t leave your abuser. Better wait it out until you’ve been there three months– so that you can still feed your kids– and hope that he doesn’t kill you in the meantime. If you work for a small business, your employer can apparently fire you when you don’t show up to work because you’re busy getting your face stitched back up.
Oh, and you also have to provide “notice” and “evidence.” “So, boss, I think that later on this week I’m going to finally find the strength to leave my abusive husband. You think I can get Thursday off for that? No? How about Friday?” Or “My abusive boyfriend usually beats me up on Saturday nights after he comes home drunk– I have a feeling that it’s going to be really bad this week and I might end up in the hospital and pressing criminal charges. So I might not be able to make it in on Monday.”
And evidence? What exactly constitutes evidence? What if he didn’t leave marks on you? What if you never pressed criminal charges? What if you moved back in with your mother instead of going to a domestic violence shelter? This law seems to be completely oblivious to the actual realities of domestic abuse victims. This isn’t a fucking Lifetime movie– many victims never press charges and many abusers are smart enough to not leave bruises or break any bones. It’s still abuse.
The fact that anyone took initiative on this issue is good. But we can do a hell of a lot better.

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what I love most about your posts is how you never except as.. “this will do.” Because it won’t. And though a lot of people may find a legislation like this a victory, it’s still very understated and far from where it should/could be, and you say that. Thanks.
And even if the leave were longer, the law states “The leave may be with or without pay, at the employer’s discretion.”
So even if it were a whole week or two, what woman who’s in an abusive situation feels she can give up ANY pay? Not very many, I’d wager. And what employer will be glad to pay her if she’s not actually working? Not very many, I’d wager.
In any event, the abused woman has no say in whether or not her man abuses her; she has no say in how long she needs to recover before her job is lost to her; she has no say in whether or not she is paid for her leave. She basically has no say at all.
What a horrible thing to know about life.
This doesn’t have anything to do with this post, but I thought I’d share how sexist Catholics are:
http://orthfullycatholic.blogspot.com/2007/07/altar-boys-vs-altar-girls.html
This is one of the reasons that I tend towards socialistic systems- I absolutely agree that anyone trying to leave an abusive situation needs the financial resources to survive doing so, but I can also understand where some of those limits are coming from. In this day and age, small businesses don’t always have the resources to compensate employees long term if they’re not there working. What I’d like to see is a fund set up to help defer some of that financial burden so that small businesses can offer the kind of safety net that someone leaving an abusive relationship needs. Of course, if we had a better healthcare system, maybe the money that businesses are dumping into healthcare and employee coverage could to a fund set up as a safety net for leave like this?
Or maybe there should be two types of leave in general: Recreational Leave and Misfortunate Leave. Recreational Leave is any time you want a vacation or a long weekend etc. Misfortune Leave would be if you’re sick, or your kid is sick, or there’s a death in the family, or you have a court date, or a case like this where you’re trying to leave an abusive relationship?
I’m not sure what the best solution is, but, you’re right, this doesn’t sound like it, even if it’s a step in the right direction.
This really makes me want to scream and cry at the same time. It is not really a solution is it? I mean, it seems more to me like a condescending “shut up for now” technique. Like you said Shelley, there are many people that could look at the headline and think of this as a victory, but it is not. It really seems more of a way to placate us. And as Sister Mary said, “she” has no say at all. The people writing this legislation up obviously has NO clue what it is to be in that kind of situation, even worse, they have no drive to TRY to empathize.
This is so horrifically disappointing. Makes me wonder how they do it in other countries–especially with Sicko fresh in my mind, I’m curious as to whether places like France do a better job on this. Anyone know?
for me, it’s pretty easy for the person who wrote this.. i’m have gone thru at this.. i have an abusive husband.. i had an IPO but no use.. i lose my job because my husband go to my office and see my boss.. then i almost lose my son because i bring my son to private clinic to see doctor when he had head injuries from his abusive father.. at last i had to reconcile and stay together with this stupid man.. for my son sake..
finally, now i got a better job offer.. but am wondering should i cancel my IPO because of worried it may affect my career.. if my boss found out.. please advices..
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