Comments on: We Don’t Need No (Sex)Education http://thecurvature.com/2008/02/28/we-dont-need-no-sexeducation/ Sat, 13 Mar 2010 17:30:14 +0000 http://wordpress.org/?v=2.9.2 hourly 1 By: Real Sex Education Gets a Chance : The Curvature http://thecurvature.com/2008/02/28/we-dont-need-no-sexeducation/#comment-10193 Real Sex Education Gets a Chance : The Curvature Fri, 06 Feb 2009 16:41:46 +0000 http://thecurvature.com/2008/02/28/we-dont-need-no-sexeducation/#comment-10193 [...] up and down* This is what I’ve been suggesting!  For so long!  It’s the kind of sex education I’ve written about extensively here, and in my essay for Yes Means Yes.  Someone — in the U.S.! — is [...] [...] up and down* This is what I’ve been suggesting!  For so long!  It’s the kind of sex education I’ve written about extensively here, and in my essay for Yes Means Yes.  Someone — in the U.S.! — is [...]

]]> By: The Importance of Real Sex Education : The Curvature http://thecurvature.com/2008/02/28/we-dont-need-no-sexeducation/#comment-5183 The Importance of Real Sex Education : The Curvature Mon, 26 May 2008 18:58:51 +0000 http://thecurvature.com/2008/02/28/we-dont-need-no-sexeducation/#comment-5183 [...] Real sex education is not the same as porn education. It’s about teaching that pleasure is an important part of any sexual relationship. It’s about teaching that there is nothing wrong with wanting to feel sexual pleasure and wanting to seek it out, so long as it is done safely and responsibly. It’s about teaching comfort with one’s body, a lack of shame over desires, and that there is more to sex for all people than sticking penises inside of vaginas. Real sex education is teaching how to go about making intelligent, safe choices, rather than just stating the choices available. I believe that there is a big difference. And I believe that teaching teens to make smart choices about sex must involve teaching them that having sex, partnered or alone, can be a smart choice. [...] [...] Real sex education is not the same as porn education. It’s about teaching that pleasure is an important part of any sexual relationship. It’s about teaching that there is nothing wrong with wanting to feel sexual pleasure and wanting to seek it out, so long as it is done safely and responsibly. It’s about teaching comfort with one’s body, a lack of shame over desires, and that there is more to sex for all people than sticking penises inside of vaginas. Real sex education is teaching how to go about making intelligent, safe choices, rather than just stating the choices available. I believe that there is a big difference. And I believe that teaching teens to make smart choices about sex must involve teaching them that having sex, partnered or alone, can be a smart choice. [...]

]]> By: Cara http://thecurvature.com/2008/02/28/we-dont-need-no-sexeducation/#comment-3656 Cara Tue, 04 Mar 2008 01:22:30 +0000 http://thecurvature.com/2008/02/28/we-dont-need-no-sexeducation/#comment-3656 I guess the only good part is that you knew which kid to never, ever date . . . the bad part is that not everyone else in the world got the same information. Which is why what the teacher did was so appalling, of course. There aren't a whole lot of great "teaching moments" in life to explain what rape is. To pass it up and outright condone the opinion that rape is not rape . . . it seems to me that it's just kind of setting up the kid with that opinion to be a rapist (or if female, to defend rape). (And this would be the "rape culture" I'm always going on about.) I guess the only good part is that you knew which kid to never, ever date . . . the bad part is that not everyone else in the world got the same information. Which is why what the teacher did was so appalling, of course. There aren’t a whole lot of great “teaching moments” in life to explain what rape is. To pass it up and outright condone the opinion that rape is not rape . . . it seems to me that it’s just kind of setting up the kid with that opinion to be a rapist (or if female, to defend rape). (And this would be the “rape culture” I’m always going on about.)

]]> By: Jenee http://thecurvature.com/2008/02/28/we-dont-need-no-sexeducation/#comment-3654 Jenee Mon, 03 Mar 2008 23:09:04 +0000 http://thecurvature.com/2008/02/28/we-dont-need-no-sexeducation/#comment-3654 The teacher was male. But he was the "cool" health teacher that everyone really, really liked (except me). The teacher was male. But he was the “cool” health teacher that everyone really, really liked (except me).

]]> By: Cara http://thecurvature.com/2008/02/28/we-dont-need-no-sexeducation/#comment-3639 Cara Fri, 29 Feb 2008 22:39:03 +0000 http://thecurvature.com/2008/02/28/we-dont-need-no-sexeducation/#comment-3639 Jenee, that . . . is absolutely appalling. I don't even have the words. Just wondering: was the teacher male or female? (Horrible and possible either way, I'm just curious.) Jenee, that . . . is absolutely appalling. I don’t even have the words. Just wondering: was the teacher male or female? (Horrible and possible either way, I’m just curious.)

]]> By: Jenee http://thecurvature.com/2008/02/28/we-dont-need-no-sexeducation/#comment-3638 Jenee Fri, 29 Feb 2008 22:26:35 +0000 http://thecurvature.com/2008/02/28/we-dont-need-no-sexeducation/#comment-3638 When I was in health class, in Illinois actually, we did cover the concept of consent in our sex education (don't start clapping yet, though). We watched this video in which a girl goes on a date with some popular, attractive guy and he takes her to some abandoned warehouse or something and forces himself upon her as she struggles and says "no" over and over. At the end of the video, we were asked to raise our hands to say whether or not what we had seen should be considered rape. One kid (or maybe one more, it's been several years) raised their hands saying that the had not thought it was rape. I got all pissed off, of course, and demanded that they justify that what they'd witnessed did not show she did not consent. Then, unbelievably, the teacher chastised me for not being tolerant of other people's opinions! I continued to try to protest, but I was shushed. Given the scenes involving the aftermath of the girl's rape - her crying in a shower after she got home with all of her clothes on, and the girl's brother not believing her because the popular guy told everyone that she wanted it. In the end she confronts him at school and says outright "You raped me." I don't think that the actions of my teacher were what the video was intending to elicit. Even when they do cover the ideas of consent and rape, it doesn't mean they're doing anything to help clarify the idea. When I was in health class, in Illinois actually, we did cover the concept of consent in our sex education (don’t start clapping yet, though).

We watched this video in which a girl goes on a date with some popular, attractive guy and he takes her to some abandoned warehouse or something and forces himself upon her as she struggles and says “no” over and over. At the end of the video, we were asked to raise our hands to say whether or not what we had seen should be considered rape. One kid (or maybe one more, it’s been several years) raised their hands saying that the had not thought it was rape. I got all pissed off, of course, and demanded that they justify that what they’d witnessed did not show she did not consent. Then, unbelievably, the teacher chastised me for not being tolerant of other people’s opinions! I continued to try to protest, but I was shushed.

Given the scenes involving the aftermath of the girl’s rape – her crying in a shower after she got home with all of her clothes on, and the girl’s brother not believing her because the popular guy told everyone that she wanted it. In the end she confronts him at school and says outright “You raped me.” I don’t think that the actions of my teacher were what the video was intending to elicit.

Even when they do cover the ideas of consent and rape, it doesn’t mean they’re doing anything to help clarify the idea.

]]> By: Feminist Avatar http://thecurvature.com/2008/02/28/we-dont-need-no-sexeducation/#comment-3623 Feminist Avatar Fri, 29 Feb 2008 11:05:45 +0000 http://thecurvature.com/2008/02/28/we-dont-need-no-sexeducation/#comment-3623 And to add to the above, they still counted themselves as virgins even if they had done everything short of penetration, so they could hand on heart promise abstinence. And to add to the above, they still counted themselves as virgins even if they had done everything short of penetration, so they could hand on heart promise abstinence.

]]> By: Feminist Avatar http://thecurvature.com/2008/02/28/we-dont-need-no-sexeducation/#comment-3622 Feminist Avatar Fri, 29 Feb 2008 11:04:12 +0000 http://thecurvature.com/2008/02/28/we-dont-need-no-sexeducation/#comment-3622 The irony is that teenagers come up with their own definitions of what is and isn't sex based on this lack of information. I know when I was a teenager most teenagers didn't count mutual masterbation or oral sex as SEX. As we all were taught, sex has to involve vaginas and penises connecting. The result being that people did not use contraception/protection for non-vaginal sex, because they didn't see what they were doing as sex. The irony is that teenagers come up with their own definitions of what is and isn’t sex based on this lack of information. I know when I was a teenager most teenagers didn’t count mutual masterbation or oral sex as SEX. As we all were taught, sex has to involve vaginas and penises connecting. The result being that people did not use contraception/protection for non-vaginal sex, because they didn’t see what they were doing as sex.

]]> By: Ellie http://thecurvature.com/2008/02/28/we-dont-need-no-sexeducation/#comment-3618 Ellie Thu, 28 Feb 2008 23:28:43 +0000 http://thecurvature.com/2008/02/28/we-dont-need-no-sexeducation/#comment-3618 I'll be having sex ed later this semester. I'm not sure how I'm supposed to keep my mouth shut while listening to lies like that. Actually, I'm considering printing off studies and waving them at the teachers whenever they get to the 'condoms don't work and you can get AIDS from skin contact' section. I just worry that some of the kids will actually buy into this crap. I’ll be having sex ed later this semester. I’m not sure how I’m supposed to keep my mouth shut while listening to lies like that. Actually, I’m considering printing off studies and waving them at the teachers whenever they get to the ‘condoms don’t work and you can get AIDS from skin contact’ section.

I just worry that some of the kids will actually buy into this crap.

]]> By: Moody http://thecurvature.com/2008/02/28/we-dont-need-no-sexeducation/#comment-3617 Moody Thu, 28 Feb 2008 20:54:39 +0000 http://thecurvature.com/2008/02/28/we-dont-need-no-sexeducation/#comment-3617 My daughter will be going through the sex ed course in a couple of years. She's in 3rd grade now. Since we're living in Southern KY, I'm worried about the "education" she'll be getting. We plan on giving her the "It's Perfectly Normal" book, and direct her to the teenwire website when she's old enough. (I've checked it out, it gets the thumbs up from me.) I still worry about the other kids in her class that will likely receive limited and filtered sex-ed. My daughter will be going through the sex ed course in a couple of years. She’s in 3rd grade now. Since we’re living in Southern KY, I’m worried about the “education” she’ll be getting.
We plan on giving her the “It’s Perfectly Normal” book, and direct her to the teenwire website when she’s old enough. (I’ve checked it out, it gets the thumbs up from me.)
I still worry about the other kids in her class that will likely receive limited and filtered sex-ed.

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