Comments on: Now Ladies, Science Says That Sex is Bad, Mmmkay?

By: Whit

Whit — Wed, 23 Sep 2009 20:43:29 +0000

First off, we need an understanding of what evolution is.

Evolution is defined as change in the genetic material of a population of organisms from one generation to the next.

This article makes a blunder I would like to point out.

“Evolution often acts through positive or negative emotions which draw us towards adaptive behaviours or drives us away from harmful ones.”

It is very, very tricky to say that emotions are genetic. How much of our emotional responses stem from genetics as opposed to culture, psychology and experience is a topic that is up for debate. As a scientist, he cannot say “Evolution often acts through positive or negative emotions” like it is common knowledge and expect his work to be taken seriously.

Also, to my understanding it claims that the survey was conducted online, basically a survey of convenience. Online surveys are not valid, they are usually not truly random samples, and are usually taken by individuals who have strong feelings one way or the other.

I call this piece, Bullshit.

By: Trisha

Trisha — Mon, 04 May 2009 19:55:51 +0000

I stumbled upon this while googling the title of the movie I am working on “Science Sex and the Ladies” It’s a non-fiction movie that centers around the very basic misunderstandings regarding female sexulaity. Mainly that women exist in a very different sexual environment than men do – particularly because women as a whole don’t orgasm as much as men do. Not that they can’t orgasm as much – because they certainly can. It is simply that in our culture they don’t. The movie discusses why this might be the case and what might be the implications of that unfortunate fact. Studies and media representaions like this are all too common, and I enjoyed reading your comments. I can see that the base problem here is pretty clear to some of you and I hope to open this discussion wider with my movie. Thanks! You can check out the production blog for the movie if you’re interested http://www.sciencesexandtheladies.blogspot.com It doesn’t have too much about the content of the movie, but if you want to discuss at all it’s trisha@ancmovies.com

By: Anna

Anna — Sun, 18 Jan 2009 16:06:00 +0000

and p.s. Amy – I’ve never felt like I’ve ‘bonded’ with anyone more as a result of having sex with them. I bond with people by having conversations with them, by sharing life with them, by spending time with them. Maybe my hormones are defective. Or something.

By: Anna

Anna — Sun, 18 Jan 2009 16:03:27 +0000

evolutionary psychology as a cheap cover for misogyny? check. dear me.

I’ve had numerous one night stands. Most of them left me feeling like shit. You know why? Because when people find out, when the asinine men I had an unsatisfactory fuck with decides to tell everyone I get labelled a slut, a whore, a girl who ‘can’t be raped because she’d drop her knickers for anyone’. I’m cheap, I’m easy, I’m fair game for anyone to sexually assault on a night out because, you know, as a result of a few one-night-stands I’m totally up for it, with anyone, ALL THE TIME.

Except I’m, you know, not.

The one night stands I feel a lot more positive about? The men I slept with that didn’t behave like that (sadly few.. I can think of one off the top of my head), and oddly enough, the women (who have never acted like that at all). It ain’t the casual sex that fucks you up, it’s how society treats you afterwards. “Nice girls don’t sleep around”.

Whilst writing this I realised that actually.. I don’t want to be a nice girl.

By: Cara

Cara — Sun, 18 Jan 2009 15:12:02 +0000

Well clearly if that's Amy's experience, it must be true for everyone!!!! Seriously Amy, I'm sorry that you've had some bad experiences with some asshole guys. And I don't at all doubt that you have. Nor do I doubt you when you tell us how sex is connected in your mind with bonding. But let's not use how you think and how in your experience guys seem to think to paint all of humanity with the same large brush. Not every woman is you, and not every woman's sex drive works like yours. Not all men are the asshole(s) you've slept with or have sex drives that work like theirs. Really, it's very simple and kind of annoying to have to explain.

By: Amy

Amy — Sun, 18 Jan 2009 07:53:58 +0000

Actually, I don’t agree at all. I think women DO have a biological aversion to casual sex. In evolution women who had non-committed sex with men that were not going to support them or their offspring took a huge risk and often died in childbirth or their children died. It’s for this reason that women are programmed to seek love and commitment and bond to a sex partner. I like sex, but think it’s part of a bonding experience. Men just want sex as a physical thing. Even when i’m drunk, im not out looking for casual sex and I wouldn’t have casual sex because i’m horny, even if I’m drunk and had a one night stand, it would be because i want to feel close to them i.e. a bonding thing. If a man leads me on to get sex and then doesn’t call me, I inevitably feel hurt and used. In contrast I never lead men on to get sex, because I only want sex with someone i want to form a meaningful/loving connection with. Whereas men want sex with every girl they can! no strings – even better in their eyes! I agree, men ARE more likely to be assholes during casual sex, but only because they see sex as a physical thing, not an emotional thing. Unlike women, a man’s hormones do not prompt him to bond to a sex partner, nor be discerning about whom he has sex with. Men just to go for whatever sex they can get, from whoever that girl is – they don’t care who, and then they turn and run. Thats the sad truth of it.

By: My Piece

My Piece — Tue, 12 Aug 2008 00:39:29 +0000

Casual sex because of leading to relationships? What a load of bs. You do it because you’re horny, and usually drunk. You regret it later because the sex sucked and you realized that masturbating would have been better. Then you worry about stds.

By: Rape Culture or the Perversion of Nature « XXBlaze

Rape Culture or the Perversion of Nature « XXBlaze — Sun, 20 Jul 2008 21:53:37 +0000

[...] of evolution. More often than not, they are responsible for completely non-sensible conclusions, unsupported by their own research, to explain how things like the American male aversion to pink or the female dissatisfaction with [...]

By: Genderblog » Kurz verlinkt in dieser Woche (4.7.2008)

Genderblog » Kurz verlinkt in dieser Woche (4.7.2008) — Fri, 04 Jul 2008 10:15:30 +0000

[...] Now Ladies, Science Says That Sex is Bad, Mmmkay? Somehow, all of this strikes me as having nothing to do with biology, and absolutely everything to do with social customs and gendered patterns of socially acceptable behavior. [...]

By: Cara

Cara — Tue, 01 Jul 2008 14:36:41 +0000

CLEARLY, JJ, you didn’t actually read/comprehend the argument. The argument wasn’t that men are assholes during casual sex for talking about it afterwards. The argument is that the heterosexual women in this study were less likely to be sexually satisfied. What this tells me is that the men weren’t trying very hard to provide them with pleasure. The issue wasn’t only that women were afraid of the slut-shaming, but that THEY DIDN’T FEEL APPRECIATED OR VALUDED BY THE MEN THEY WERE SLEEPING WITH. Two radically different things, and the women reported both.

Also, I’m pretty sure that your “women like men who have been preselected by other women” argument is total crap. Men don’t brag about sex to women they’re trying to sleep with. Because if a man goes up to a woman and says “so let me tell you about this hot chick I fucked last night,” chances are extraordinarily high that the woman he’s talking to isn’t going to sleep with him — if for no other reason than knowing it will be all over town the next day. Men brag about sex to other men.