Comments on: Kansas Law Allows Anonymous Rape Kits for Those Who Don’t Immediately Report

By: What she fucking said… « random babble…

What she fucking said… « random babble… — Fri, 13 Mar 2009 06:17:01 +0000

[...] Cara, Kansas Law Allows Anonymous Rape Kits for Those Who Don’t Immediately Report. Inspired me to leave a pretty lengthy comment, [...]

By: SunlessNick

SunlessNick — Thu, 12 Mar 2009 16:48:25 +0000

Much like how they regard women having sex

Sorry. Much like how they regard women allowing men to have sex with them – as opposed to not allowing it, or pursuing sex on their own terms.

By: SunlessNick

SunlessNick — Thu, 12 Mar 2009 16:46:28 +0000

“We trust you to make the decision to have a baby, but not to make the decision to have an abortion/report a rape/get appropriate medical treatment and legal protection after being raped.”Dumb and repugnant, but not unique to teenagers – adult women face the same contradiction.

I think it’s because these people don’t really regard having a baby/continuing a pregnancy as a choice, just acquiescence to the proper course. Much like how they regard women having sex or being raped. And they trust women be competent to acquiesce. But reporting a rape, accusing a rapist, ending a pregnancy – those things are choices, and so they don’t trust women with them.

By: akeeyu

akeeyu — Thu, 12 Mar 2009 15:33:43 +0000

You know, my whole thing on the parental notification thing, other than a whole lot of furious “You assholes!” frothing, is this:

If the teenager in question had the sort of relationship with their parents where telling them about the rape would be beneficial (or not harmful) to the teenager, they would already have told their parents.

I think we need to trust the judgment of the teenagers on this one. They probably know their own family dynamics.

Since teenagers are legally allowed to have children, all of this parental notification bullshit is stupid. “We trust you to make the decision to have a baby, but not to make the decision to have an abortion/report a rape/get appropriate medical treatment and legal protection after being raped.”

That’s dumb. Super dumb.

By: hexy

hexy — Thu, 12 Mar 2009 05:54:25 +0000

As someone who was raped at 14/15 and is now 24, I didn’t “come out” to my parents as a rape survivor until just earlier this year.

I still haven’t. I don’t know if I ever will.

By: Cara

Cara — Thu, 12 Mar 2009 02:16:04 +0000

Word, OuyanDan. You just nailed it all over the place with that comment.

By: OuyangDan

OuyangDan — Thu, 12 Mar 2009 02:00:56 +0000

We treat teenagers so shitty when it comes to this stuff. First, a good number of schools don’t give sex ed. worth a damn, and teens are constantly being bombarded w/ the Sex=dirty/evil/shameful message. But kids are going to have sex anyway, and they will have riskier sex b/c they don’t know enough/are too afraid to ask for help in doing it safely. They are already freaked out that their parents are going to find out and punish them. Now, something horrific happens, and while they are ashamed and already afraid someone is going to punish them for having sex in the first place, we want to tell their parents in order for them to get help. I can see a lot of teens not wanting to take that option.

Teens are more than real people, they are future and potential adults. The problem w/ notifications, other than the obvious about possibly re-victimizing them to an abuser, is that if we are going to say we think they are smart enough to make complex decisions about sex and abortion, then we need to make sure our laws reflect that. Either we trust them or we rat them out to potentially abusive people (or possibly just parents who could make their lives harder).

By: mzbitca

mzbitca — Thu, 12 Mar 2009 01:52:46 +0000

When I was teaching this semester I talked to them about always thinking about how new laws and rules will truly affect everyone and not just a “typical” person. I asked them if they thought there was anything wrong with a teenager needing a parent’s permission for an abortion. A lot of people were saying they thought it was reasonable. I followed it up with “What if they’re pregnant because their father has been raping them?” *silence*
I finished the section with: This stuff happens and think about who the more harmful affect is on: a mother who doesn’t know or a girl that has to worry about her abuser making her life even more painful

By: abyss2hope

abyss2hope — Wed, 11 Mar 2009 21:21:30 +0000

I agree with you about the problems inherent in requiring notification of a minor’s parents since a parent or other person in the household could be the rapist and this requirement would prevent teens from getting forensic evidence collected and would likely prevent accompanying treatment.