Comments on: In Which I Refuse to Put the “Sex Ed War” to Rest http://thecurvature.com/2009/04/10/in-which-i-refuse-to-put-the-sex-ed-war-to-rest/ Sun, 14 Mar 2010 00:23:46 +0000 http://wordpress.org/?v=2.9.2 hourly 1 By: Cara http://thecurvature.com/2009/04/10/in-which-i-refuse-to-put-the-sex-ed-war-to-rest/#comment-11803 Cara Sat, 18 Apr 2009 13:26:03 +0000 http://thecurvature.com/?p=4693#comment-11803 ... which is all to say that if there are good things to say about a program, even when you <i>openly and explicitly acknowledge</i> that it's a lot better than what most students get, you can never, ever criticize the negative aspects of it. Even when it enforces the ideas that made you think that you deserved to be raped. … which is all to say that if there are good things to say about a program, even when you openly and explicitly acknowledge that it’s a lot better than what most students get, you can never, ever criticize the negative aspects of it. Even when it enforces the ideas that made you think that you deserved to be raped.

]]> By: Dan Norfleet http://thecurvature.com/2009/04/10/in-which-i-refuse-to-put-the-sex-ed-war-to-rest/#comment-11802 Dan Norfleet Sat, 18 Apr 2009 13:22:29 +0000 http://thecurvature.com/?p=4693#comment-11802 Those who are offended by aspects of this program should understand three things. First, South Carolina Law imposes restrictions on how "comprehensive" a school-based sex-ed program can be; believe it not, this one pushes the limits. Second, the alternative to this program is Heritage Community Services which has received about $37 Million in state and federal funds in SC over the last ten years with nothing to show for it. (Google the name "Heritage Community Services" to see what a nightmare this program presents.) And third, the program is an effective school based program which is a lot to say in a State that has the second highest unemployment rate in the Country, some of the highest teenage pregnancy rates, STD rates, and cervical cancer rates in the country, and is 50th (or 49th) in education. Those who are offended by aspects of this program should understand three things.

First, South Carolina Law imposes restrictions on how “comprehensive” a school-based sex-ed program can be; believe it not, this one pushes the limits. Second, the alternative to this program is Heritage Community Services which has received about $37 Million in state and federal funds in SC over the last ten years with nothing to show for it. (Google the name “Heritage Community Services” to see what a nightmare this program presents.) And third, the program is an effective school based program which is a lot to say in a State that has the second highest unemployment rate in the Country, some of the highest teenage pregnancy rates, STD rates, and cervical cancer rates in the country, and is 50th (or 49th) in education.

]]> By: Anna http://thecurvature.com/2009/04/10/in-which-i-refuse-to-put-the-sex-ed-war-to-rest/#comment-11783 Anna Fri, 17 Apr 2009 01:20:53 +0000 http://thecurvature.com/?p=4693#comment-11783 I'm sorry if I gave the impression they were all like that - i certainly did not mean to. Not much of an idea what it's like over there, but I know here they're pretty much exempt from every secular law (i.e. should teach about sex ed, consent, abortion, etc) I’m sorry if I gave the impression they were all like that – i certainly did not mean to. Not much of an idea what it’s like over there, but I know here they’re pretty much exempt from every secular law (i.e. should teach about sex ed, consent, abortion, etc)

]]> By: Cara http://thecurvature.com/2009/04/10/in-which-i-refuse-to-put-the-sex-ed-war-to-rest/#comment-11782 Cara Thu, 16 Apr 2009 23:30:26 +0000 http://thecurvature.com/?p=4693#comment-11782 <blockquote>To answer your question Cara, we are taught the punishment of rapists, the intense recovery and depression of some victims, and how “no means no” always. So yes, we are essentially taught to not rape.</blockquote> Well it's certainly better than nothing, but not quite the kind of intense lessons in consent I had in mind.

To answer your question Cara, we are taught the punishment of rapists, the intense recovery and depression of some victims, and how “no means no” always. So yes, we are essentially taught to not rape.

Well it’s certainly better than nothing, but not quite the kind of intense lessons in consent I had in mind.

]]> By: esd123 http://thecurvature.com/2009/04/10/in-which-i-refuse-to-put-the-sex-ed-war-to-rest/#comment-11780 esd123 Thu, 16 Apr 2009 20:15:09 +0000 http://thecurvature.com/?p=4693#comment-11780 To answer your question Cara, we are taught the punishment of rapists, the intense recovery and depression of some victims, and how "no means no" always. So yes, we are essentially taught to not rape. That is not the classes focus, but stopping violence as well as teaching how to deal with it as a victim as well is part of the curriculum. also, to respond the Anna, i go to a private school and they are all definitely not like that. I go to a school with a fantastic health educator that never judges anyone for the choices they make, just gives us all the information we would need to have safe sex if we choose, and covers what i talked about before regarding sexual assault. I do come from a very liberal and unique private school, so my situation is fairly rare, but privates school should not be all put in one category. To answer your question Cara, we are taught the punishment of rapists, the intense recovery and depression of some victims, and how “no means no” always. So yes, we are essentially taught to not rape. That is not the classes focus, but stopping violence as well as teaching how to deal with it as a victim as well is part of the curriculum.

also, to respond the Anna, i go to a private school and they are all definitely not like that. I go to a school with a fantastic health educator that never judges anyone for the choices they make, just gives us all the information we would need to have safe sex if we choose, and covers what i talked about before regarding sexual assault. I do come from a very liberal and unique private school, so my situation is fairly rare, but privates school should not be all put in one category.

]]> By: Anna http://thecurvature.com/2009/04/10/in-which-i-refuse-to-put-the-sex-ed-war-to-rest/#comment-11764 Anna Thu, 16 Apr 2009 08:44:41 +0000 http://thecurvature.com/?p=4693#comment-11764 I'm not sure of the difference between the two - I've never heard the other term used. Google informs me it definitely wasn't though - just a private school. I am over in the UK, if that makes a difference. I’m not sure of the difference between the two – I’ve never heard the other term used. Google informs me it definitely wasn’t though – just a private school. I am over in the UK, if that makes a difference.

]]> By: Kat http://thecurvature.com/2009/04/10/in-which-i-refuse-to-put-the-sex-ed-war-to-rest/#comment-11762 Kat Thu, 16 Apr 2009 07:14:41 +0000 http://thecurvature.com/?p=4693#comment-11762 Anna, Perhaps you mean parochial schools, not private schools? I went to secular private schools and my experiences in sex ed were the polar opposite of yours. I'm sure, however, that Catholic and other religious schools are allowed to "get away with murder" as you put it. I've actually heard of sex ed being used as a reason not to send children to public schools (by both evangelical and catholic parents).....god forbid we should learn anatomy and biology (at the VERY least). Anna,
Perhaps you mean parochial schools, not private schools?
I went to secular private schools and my experiences in sex ed were the polar opposite of yours.

I’m sure, however, that Catholic and other religious schools are allowed to “get away with murder” as you put it. I’ve actually heard of sex ed being used as a reason not to send children to public schools (by both evangelical and catholic parents)…..god forbid we should learn anatomy and biology (at the VERY least).

]]> By: Anna http://thecurvature.com/2009/04/10/in-which-i-refuse-to-put-the-sex-ed-war-to-rest/#comment-11747 Anna Wed, 15 Apr 2009 14:54:43 +0000 http://thecurvature.com/?p=4693#comment-11747 If only private schools were made to do this too - the school I attended basically went 1. abortion is the butchering of innocent children by the very person who should protect them (and we were shown videos of late-term abortions and handed out little badges with hands and feet on them.) 2. these are zygotes, this is the female hormone, this is the male hormone, this is a penis, this is a vagina, penis goes in vagina and baby is made. 3. only sluts have sex before marraige. if you have sex outside marriage you will get an STI, be totally scarred for life both internally and externally and you will probably get pregnant and bring much shame on your family and ruin your life when you Do Not Have That Abortion. .. probably helps to explain why I didn't really have a consensual sexual experience with a boy until I was eighteen (became sexually active at 14). it's such, such a big deal.. and, well, schools get away with murder. I truly believe *all* the difference could be made if more emphasis was placed on emphasising love, trust, and more importantly consent (because you don't have to love everyone you fuck, but consent is non-negotiable). It's sad. If only private schools were made to do this too – the school I attended basically went 1. abortion is the butchering of innocent children by the very person who should protect them (and we were shown videos of late-term abortions and handed out little badges with hands and feet on them.) 2. these are zygotes, this is the female hormone, this is the male hormone, this is a penis, this is a vagina, penis goes in vagina and baby is made. 3. only sluts have sex before marraige. if you have sex outside marriage you will get an STI, be totally scarred for life both internally and externally and you will probably get pregnant and bring much shame on your family and ruin your life when you Do Not Have That Abortion.

.. probably helps to explain why I didn’t really have a consensual sexual experience with a boy until I was eighteen (became sexually active at 14). it’s such, such a big deal.. and, well, schools get away with murder. I truly believe *all* the difference could be made if more emphasis was placed on emphasising love, trust, and more importantly consent (because you don’t have to love everyone you fuck, but consent is non-negotiable). It’s sad.

]]> By: Cara http://thecurvature.com/2009/04/10/in-which-i-refuse-to-put-the-sex-ed-war-to-rest/#comment-11743 Cara Wed, 15 Apr 2009 12:57:38 +0000 http://thecurvature.com/?p=4693#comment-11743 Hey Esd123, thanks for sharing. What concerns me is this: <blockquote>we talk about safe sex as well as what defines sexual assault, and how to avoid it</blockquote> Maybe I'm misreading or you're not phrasing quite right, but this is what I'm talking about in my post. You're say that you're being taught how to <i>avoid</i> sexual assault. But are you also being taught how to not commit it? Hey Esd123, thanks for sharing. What concerns me is this:

we talk about safe sex as well as what defines sexual assault, and how to avoid it

Maybe I’m misreading or you’re not phrasing quite right, but this is what I’m talking about in my post. You’re say that you’re being taught how to avoid sexual assault. But are you also being taught how to not commit it?

]]> By: esd123 http://thecurvature.com/2009/04/10/in-which-i-refuse-to-put-the-sex-ed-war-to-rest/#comment-11729 esd123 Wed, 15 Apr 2009 02:38:03 +0000 http://thecurvature.com/?p=4693#comment-11729 So i've never even been on this site till tonight, but i found it through stumble upon and am really interested and active in topics like this. Being 15 years old, Sex education is really important to me and i don't like it when people act as if its not. Although i agree with what your saying, i don't think that saying all sex ed teaches kids to resist sex completely, and doesn't differ between peer pressure and assault. I'm currently taking sex ed at school, and we talk about safe sex as well as what defines sexual assault, and how to avoid it. Maybe some school teach a looser version of sexual assault, but not all or even most to my knoledge. I just wanted to give the perpective of someone who is going through sex ed right now. So i’ve never even been on this site till tonight, but i found it through stumble upon and am really interested and active in topics like this. Being 15 years old, Sex education is really important to me and i don’t like it when people act as if its not. Although i agree with what your saying, i don’t think that saying all sex ed teaches kids to resist sex completely, and doesn’t differ between peer pressure and assault. I’m currently taking sex ed at school, and we talk about safe sex as well as what defines sexual assault, and how to avoid it. Maybe some school teach a looser version of sexual assault, but not all or even most to my knoledge. I just wanted to give the perpective of someone who is going through sex ed right now.

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