Sep

30

The Today Show Uses Fear-Mongering to Demonize Midwives and Home Births

Filed Under media, misogyny, parenthood, paternalism, patriarchy, pregnancy, reproductive justice, women’s health | 7 Comments

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The embedded video above is a fairly recent segment from The Today Show on the rise in midwife-assisted home births. It’s called “The Perils of Midwifery,” and it’s a segment which, it should be noted, uses almost entirely men as reporters and experts. And as you can likely tell from the title, it’s a segment which demonizes home births and midwives as much as feasibly possible.

The segment features the McKenzie family, who have suffered a horrific tragedy — their baby, who was delivered at home with midwife assistance, did not survive. Their story is clearly a heartbreaking one, and there’s absolutely no reason that it shouldn’t be told. At the same time, though, it’s also incredibly unfair for their story to be used in place of facts, or held up as an example of common home birth outcomes. Because while it is in fact one outcome that actually occurred, it’s far from a representative one.

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Sep

28

So What If Mackenzie Phillips Has a Book Deal?

Filed Under misogyny, patriarchy, pop culture, rape and sexual assault, violence against women and girls | 25 Comments

My post about Mackenzie Phillips and the public reaction to her recent revelation that her father John Phillips raped her has been linked pretty widely at this point, and as a result I have received some rather obnoxious and outright disgusting comments (and emails). That’s not a complaint, at all — thank you for the links, everyone! — rather, it’s just a very sad aspect of blogging, a part of the deal. A lot of what I’ve received is the usual — she’s lying, he’s innocent until proven guilty, it was a long time ago so we should just drop it, etc.

But one set of responses is particularly prominent in this case. I find it fascinating, and it’s a subject that I haven’t personally seen addressed elsewhere. A whole lot of people are really, really focused on the fact that Mackenzie Phillips has written a book about her life, including in large part the abuse she faced at the hands of her father — meaning that she will make money off of talking about what he did to her.

This group of people, for the most part, don’t seem to directly deny that the abuse took place — they engage in a lot of rape apologism, yes, but not outright denial. Unlike most cases where a famous man is accused of rape and hoards of people respond “lying bitch, she’s just out for his money,” most people who bring up the fact that Mackenzie Phillips is being paid to tell her story aren’t accusing her of lying for a paycheck. They just really, really hate the fact that she’s making money from this awful situation, from her trauma, period.

But I ask you: What is so wrong with that?

Really, I would like someone to carefully explain it to me.

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Sep

26

Trans Woman Murdered in Hollywood

Filed Under bigotry, media, misogyny, patriarchy, trans, transphobia and trans misogyny, violence against women and girls | 1 Comment

Via Queen Emily, reports came in last week of yet another trans woman being murdered. Her name was Paulina Ibarra, she was 24-years-old, and she died in her apartment from stab wounds on August 28th. But her murder only made the news last week, when police identified a person of interest, named Jesus Catalan.

Los Angeles Police investigators say the transgender community was key in indentifying this person of interest in this murder case. They released a photograph of Jesus Catalan Thursday. Catalan, 24, is a wanted parolee at large and the man that detectives want to question about Paulina Ibarra’s murder.

Ibarra, a 24-year old transgendered woman, was stabbed to death inside her Hollywood apartment on August 28.

Investigators say they know that Catalan was inside Ibarra’s apartment but they don’t know exactly what happened between the two. Police do know that Catalan is known to frequent transgender prostitutes.

[...]

Jesus Catalan is 24 years old, 5 feet 9 inches tall, weighing 140 pounds, and has a tattoo on his right arm. He is known to frequent the Hollywood and West Hollywood areas. If you have any information on his whereabouts you’re urged to call the LAPD tip line at (877) LAPD-24-7. That is (877) 527-3247.

Notice how even though there is no evidence presented whatsoever that Ibarra was a sex worker, it’s heavily implied that she was, in line with the stereotype that all trans women are sex workers. And while the victim being a trans woman is more than enough to turn police (and media) off of a case in most instances, a victim’s believed identity as as sex worker also has the same horrific effect, thus compounding the already enormous problem of prejudice. Indeed, the statement about how the transgender community was key in identifying Catalan might be an indication that they were already working hard, as trans activists regularly do, to get police to care at all.

Queen Emily and commenters at Questioning Transphobia discuss some of the other problems with the article, as well.

Paulina Ibarra is hardly the only trans woman whose murder has been ignored and/or quickly forgotten by those in positions of power (police, media, etc.). Such reaction is part of a widespread trend. But Ibarra, like all the others, matters. Victoria Ortega says in the article, “We’re here to say that we’re not going to let somebody come in and kill one of our members and just let it happen and let it be forgotten.” And those of us who are cis, and especially those of us who purport to care about women, need to stand up and denounce this constant devaluing of certain human lives (usually certain women’s lives), too.

If you are in the area, please also view the wanted poster for Jesus Catalan here (pdf), and pass it along.

Sep

25

The Deal With Disability

Filed Under blogging, disability, discrimination | 1 Comment

Via Womanist Musings, I’ve come across a great blog called The Deal With Disability. The blog is written by Eva, a woman with cerebral palsy, and chronicles her experiences with how people treat her — from ignoring her, to being over-bearing and patronizing, or treating her like a child. Sometimes she writes about the experience; other times she actually records the interaction with a camera mounted discreetly on her wheelchair, and posts it along with commentary. The interactions are at turns funny, revealing, and appalling, or all at the same time.

One particularly popular video, of Eva and her aide out at a restaurant with a pushy and hovering waitress, is below:

Though a somewhat extreme example, this particular video shows a lot of common reactions to people with disabilities all at once, from ignoring social cues that would otherwise generally be acknowledged, invading personal space in a rather extreme way, treating disability as something to “feel better” from, and more.

While obviously chronicling Eva’s experiences, and therefore not covering the experiences and treatment of people with other wide-ranging disabilities, the blog exposes a great number of common and entrenched able-bodied prejudices. What it shows is that many able-bodied people respond to people with disabilities in a way that is intended to be helpful, polite, and/or friendly without considering how they would feel if someone was treating them the exact same way — one of the surest signs of privilege and prejudice. I know that I’ve seen myself in several of the interactions, and imagine that many other able-bodied people and people with disabilities different from Eva’s will see themselves, too. In line with Eva’s stated goals with the bog, it has helped me to recognize some of my own ableist assumptions, and the harmful behavior they can spawn. (And some comments on the blog also inadvertently expose defensive and self-righteous able-bodied privilege.)

Eva explains why so many common reactions to her as a person are misguided and offensive, and takes the time to also point out how things can and should go differently if only others would treat her with the same basic respect they afford to most able-bodied people. For anyone interested in social justice and breaking down privilege (whether their own, other people’s, or both), I’d call it a must-read.

Sep

24

Rape Apologism and the Response to Mackenzie Phillips

Filed Under media, misogyny, patriarchy, pop culture, rape and sexual assault, violence against women and girls | 38 Comments

john phillipsTrigger Warning

Yesterday on Oprah, Mackenzie Phillips, star from One Day At a Time, revealed that she was raped by her now-deceased father, John Phillips (left), from the Mamas and the Papas. This, after years of him supplying her with drugs from a very young age. The abuse continued for ten years, into her adulthood — Mackenzie refers to this continuation as “consensual,” though I highly doubt that it is possible for incest between a father and daughter to ever be consensual, let alone when the father has been grooming his daughter with drugs for years, and raped her for the first time, and many times after, while she was blacked out.

I don’t blame Mackenzie Phillips for referring to this abuse as “consensual incest” — many victims blame themselves, most people period interpret compliance as consent, and Stockholm Syndrome is powerful stuff. She seems to me to be doing the best she can — and from what I saw on Oprah yesterday, though she is using the word “consensual” to describe much of the sexual contact, she’s also clearly identifying all of it as abusive.

I do however blame the media, which is pretty much universally referring to Mackenzie Phillips’ revelations as being about “sex with her father.” They refer to an ongoing incestuous relationship. Some even mention the first (known) instance, in which she awoke from a blackout during the assault. But exceedingly few refer to it as rape. Most that do put the word in scare quotes, while failing to do the same when calling it sex.

Here’s the thing: Mackenzie refers to much of the sexual contact as “consensual.” I understand not wanting to put words in her mouth, and the liability that is involved with that — even though John Phillips was her father, and that should make this issue really clear cut. But the first instance was obviously rape. How do we know? Because one cannot consent to sex during a blackout. Also, because she called it as much on Oprah yesterday. She said that yes, it was rape. Her father raped her. (She also said that when she confronted him about it, his response was “Raped you? Don’t you mean the time we made love?” Extremely typical, if extremely disturbing, minimization and manipulation by an abuser.)

And I’m extraordinarily concerned that the media feels the so-called “consensual incest” is more interesting and newsworthy than explicitly defined rape. I’m seriously disturbed by the clear effort to overlook the latter in favor of the former. It shows where our priorities are, what discussions we are and aren’t comfortable with, and which transgressions are worth public shaming.

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Sep

18

Protecting Your Safety While Speaking Out is Not Irresponsible

Filed Under feminism, misogyny, patriarchy, rape and sexual assault, violence against women and girls | 27 Comments

Over at the F-Word is a post that I was absolutely horrified to see on a feminist blog (h/t gauntlet), and while there are many already speaking out in the comments, I feel strongly compelled to say something myself.

According to the post, UK celebrity Katie Price has spoken out about being raped prior to her last marriage, which was to a man who is currently making a movie that glamorizes rape. That makes it seem like a prime time to speak out. She has also apparently said that her rapist was someone who is famous, but refuses to name him and says she never will.

The response by Abby at the F-Word, titled Katie Price: Why She Should Name Her Rapist, includes the following:

While, understandably, it must be extremely difficult for rape victims to speak about their experiences, Price is a TV personality who has made the transition from glamour model to mainstream celebrity owing to her outspoken and confident public persona and her determination to speak her mind, all marketed as part of her independence and business acumen. Therefore her silence is, in itself, a strong statement.

The vast majority of women who are attacked neither speak about their experiences, nor report them to the authorities. The reasons for this are manifold, but include fear that they will not be believed, that their personal lives will be subject to the basest scrutiny and judgement, and that there will be aspersions cast upon their morality. It is a physical and emotional trauma that a lot of women suffer in silence, worried that they will be seen as the cause of their own abuse. While Price now feels able to speak about what happened to her, making the claim in a national publication, maintaining the anonymity of her attacker is not only inconsistent, but also downright irresponsible. It perpetuates the idea that rape is part of the male privilege, positioning guilty men above puishment, and suggests that female victims should consider their attacks something that they must just quietly accept.

Stating that her rapist was a celebrity was probably a decision worth thinking twice about, for her own sake — in that it would, and has, only increased public scrutiny and speculation. Such as that up above. But who among us, in speaking out, has not underestimated the hatefulness of people and thus accidentally made things more difficult on themselves? Who here has not found that in speaking out, there are more people than you could have imagined who are eager to make it as difficult as possible, anyway?

Katie Price has not done something particularly different from what I have; she has only done it while people know her name. I have spoken about being raped, and while I have never been particularly specific about the details, I have constantly mentioned that my rapist was also my boyfriend at the time. For those who have known me for many years, that is more than enough information for them to know his name. For him, were he to find me, it is also almost certainly more than enough. And that makes it enough period.

I have not given his name. I will not ever give his name publicly. And no amount of victim-blaming bullshit is going to change that.

Why? Because I value my safety. Because I value my mental health. Because I value myself.

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Sep

11

Pretending That Individual Choices Will Help Correct Structural Problems

Filed Under class and economics, pregnancy, race and racism, reproductive justice, women’s health | 17 Comments

The other day, I received a press release titled “It’s Riskier to Have a Baby in the U.S. Than in Cuba or the Czech Republic.”

This, actually, I knew. The U.S. has one of the worst infant mortality rates in the industrialized world — and one of the worst maternal mortality rates as well. And the black infant mortality rate is twice that of the white infant mortality rate, with Native American infant mortality rates and some Latino mortality rates being significantly higher than the rates among whites as well.

Given the current climate, when this press release arrived in my inbox, I expected that it was going to be a call from a women’s organization in favor of universal health care, and a comparison against other countries that do in fact have such systems. (The fact that countries we tend to look down on are so regularly used as the point of comparison, and what that suggests, is a whole other can of worms I’m not going to get into today.) Indeed, quick google searches indicate that every country listed in the press release has some sort of public health care system in place. There’d seem to be a pretty strong correlation, especially with so many up-to-date facilities in the United States, that we’re always hearing these countries with universal health care don’t have.

The press release, though, was actually promoting a book about pregnancy. And it provided “tips” — tips which use the acronym SMART — for how pregnant American women can “improve their chances of having a healthy baby”:

S = Seek prenatal care early. Tests for potential chromosome problems, including mental retardation and spina bifida (a condition that causes paralysis) can be conducted only in the first and second trimesters. A first trimester ultrasound is also the most accurate in terms of determining a due date.

M = Mention all risk factors such as a family history of diabetes, high blood pressure, Rh negative blood, premature labor, bleeding problems or genetic conditions to your healthcare professional as soon as possible. Do not omit information such as smoking or using “recreational” drugs because such activities can affect your baby.

A = Ask to have your cervix measured during your ultrasound if you have a history of premature contractions or delivery. A cervical length of 2.5 centimeters or less is a risk factor for preterm labor. If you are at risk for delivering before 37 weeks, ask your healthcare provider about receiving steroids to help your baby’s lungs develop.

R = Research your hospital and prospective physician or midwife carefully. Is the physician or midwife skilled in managing high-risk conditions? Will your care continue if you lose your insurance? Has the newborn nursery had any recent outbreaks of antibiotic-resistant infections? Is the hospital a level-three facility?

T = Test for potential problems such as gestational diabetes, sickle cell trait and cystic fibrosis, and check for appropriate fetal growth with an ultrasound.

I imagine that this might pretty solid advice (though I don’t actually know one way or the other) — if you’re actually able to follow it.

But considering the email’s opening, and the highly relevant fact that tens of millions of Americans do not have health care access, I was basically blown away by the “advice” and the necessary level of privilege that it involves — even if this kind of thing is an incredibly and increasingly common sight. And its frequency is a big part of the reason why it’s worth discussing.

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Sep

8

Some Thoughts on Tucker Max

Filed Under assholes, education and schools, misogyny, patriarchy, rape and sexual assault, violence against women and girls | 17 Comments

Over at Broadsheet, the marvelous Sady writes about the Tucker Max phenomenon. Tucker Max is an asshole who makes money from writing books about his (supposed) drunken sexual conquests — and by “drunken sexual conquests,” I mean, “the encounters as he describes them often include coercion, cajoling, heavy intoxication or some element of non-consent and therefore fit the moral definition of sexual assault and, according to some organizations, the legal definition in many places.” (Feel free to go read his website for evidence; I did, but I’m not linking it.) Max makes money from his books, some film he has out, repeatedly calling women by misogynistic names, and also — the subject of particular interest right now — by giving lectures. On college campuses.

These lectures have, quite logically, spawned protests. In her post, Sady argues that the protests are misguided — not because Tucker Max isn’t a piece of shit, but because he thrives off of the attention, and protesting him is giving him what he wants.

Max is a showman. Being hated is a part of his act. He’s a self-described asshole who succeeds by getting people to agree with him. His fans think he’s saying what they can’t; his critics think he’s saying what no one should. But if you’re offended, you’ve noticed him. And for his fans, knowing that he’s picketed by feminists — feminists! Dreaded nemeses of parties and good time! — isn’t cause for concern, but a ringing endorsement.

Giving Max his very own protest makes him seem far important than he actually is. It gives him the enemies he needs. And although Max is getting testier about the protesters, his most telling statement is in his blog post about the OSU incident.

“This was one of the coolest things that has ever happened to me,” he wrote. “This is the type of shit that only happens to famous people.”

Now, I said up above that Sady is marvelous, and I agree with her something like 95% of the time. This is one of those times when I’m going to have to very strongly disagree, at least partially. First of all, I’ve never been a huge fan of the “ignore him and he’ll go away” approach. Secondly, it may indeed be true that Tucker Max doesn’t warrant a protest, but his lectures on the other hand, absolutely do. Because while Max personally thrives off of the attention, he is not the one that these protests should be trying to reach. Nor, actually, is the student body who will attend his shows anyway.

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Sep

6

The Beatles: Rock Band Mega Post

Filed Under Gratuitous Beatles Blogging, fun | 7 Comments

the beatles: rock band rooftop

Alright, Beatles fans. You might all be too busy practicing your Rock Band skills or attempting to nail Beatles harmonies to even read this. (My own mom, who has been mocking me for my excitement, called me yesterday from the middle of a car trip to ask me if a couple songs were in the game — she was using the time to practice her vocals.) But I couldn’t let The Beatles: Rock Band arrive in our living rooms — in less than three days — without just one more post.

So this is the mega-post. I said before that I couldn’t just make a top 5 or top 10 list of songs I’m most anticipating playing in the game, because there are just too many, and of course, so many ways of playing them. And what might the solution to this dilemma be? A list for each part in the game, of course!

A few songs make more than one appearance, because they kick so much ass in more than one aspect. I have to say that I pretty much shocked myself with the revelation of what song I am apparently looking the most forward to overall, based on its number of appearances.

I know that usually I include a video for each song, but I assumed that most people would find 20 videos embedded in one post to be a bit of an overkill. So I’ll embed the videos for the number one slot in each category, and just link the rest for those of you who feel the urge to refresh your memories on the parts I’m talking about, or simply listen.

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Sep

3

Help SAFER Win $10,000

Filed Under action alert, blogging, feminism, rape and sexual assault, violence against women and girls | 2 Comments

During the 24-hour Blogathon just over a month ago, I think that I made my deep respect and support for Students Active For Ending Rape (SAFER) quite clear. And so I just wanted to give them a shout out now — they have a chance at winning $10,000 for the organization, and just two or three minutes of your time can help them win.

Ideablob is a site that allows people to present their ideas to an internet audience. Users vote on the best idea from each round of submissions, and the one that gets the most votes wins a $10,000 grant to put that idea to good use. It’s really that simple.

Click here to vote for SAFER now.

You will have to register for the site first, but that will only take a minute or two. You can make sure that you’re not on any of their email lists after you sign up and vote by going to your profile, then settings, and unchecking the appropriate boxes. Again, it took me two or three minutes, I’m not going to get any unwanted email as a result, and it’s going to a great cause! Go, vote! And then tell others to do the same on Twitter, Facebook, etc.

And while I’m writing, I wanted to just fill you in that I’m rather busy as of late, and of course with the most exciting day of my life coming up next Wednesday, I’ll be a bit distracted on that end as well. I still plan on getting that last Beatles: Rock Band post at you on Saturday (fingers crossed), but other than that, blogging will sadly continue to suffer for the next week and a half. (Assuming, of course, that you consider very light blogging with most posts that do actually go up being about a music video game to be “suffering.” Ha.) See you soon!