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“A dream you dream alone is only a dream; a dream you dream together is reality.” — Yoko Ono
Jan
15
Alleged Victim Slut-Shamed, Rape Case Thrown Out
Filed Under Europe, International, assholes, bigotry, courts, misogyny, patriarchy, rape and sexual assault, slut-shaming, violence against women and girls | 8 Comments
A particular rape case has been making the rounds lately, for its especially ludicrous and misogynistic outcome. In short, a U.K. woman made allegations of a gang rape by five perpetrators. The case made it to court. And then, the judge ordered the jury to return a not guilty verdict when “evidence” was presented — not by the defense, but the prosecution — showing that the alleged victim had made statements online about her fantasies involving group sex. The revelation that she had had group sex fantasies was, in fact, the entire reason presented for the dismissal of the case. Indeed, agreeing with the prosecutor, the judge remarked that with the admission of these fantasies, “her credibility was shot to pieces.”
Many have written about this case by now, ranging from the F-Word, to Penny Red, to Pandora Blake (Note: images on this site may be NSFW). These are all great posts that each touch on several important points — I particularly like Pandora’s concise statement that “Desire is not consent. Consent is consent.” — and I highly recommend that you go check them all out, right now, if you have not already. Especially since I’m going to avoid repeating those points very much here.
Because with all of the astute analysis I’ve seen, one thing I’m not seeing discussed a lot is the nature of the fantasy itself. I’m very, very glad, on the one hand, to see that a fantasy of group sex is not being treated as some sort of abnormal, shameful thing for a woman to fantasize about, and that women are not being treated as immoral for having sexual fantasies at all and particularly immoral for having a fantasy that involves multiple partners. This is very important, and good on everyone for it.
But I also think it’s important to acknowledge the cultural context in which the decision was made. And that cultural context is one of a world in which group sex is seen as being among the most debasing things that a woman could think about, let alone do. In a misogynistic world where sex is seen as inherently degrading to a woman’s sense of integrity, sex with multiple partners at the same time is seen to leave her with no integrity left at all.
And so while I’m willing to be entirely proven wrong, and while I put absolutely nothing past the courts at this point, I think it’s a lot less likely — possible, but less likely — that we’d be seeing this case exist if the woman had fantasized about “vanilla” intercourse with a single partner, and then was raped by a single man. I think this case is less about whether or not a woman has a right to refuse consent to something she has previously expressed interest in — though it certainly is about that as well, and this is an ongoing source of horrific rape trial outcomes — but more about whether or not a “slut” has a right to ever say no to anything. The victim in this case has been officially portrayed, by way of her fantasy and cultural attitude towards it, as a “slut.” And the answer to the question by the prosecutor and judge alike is “no, a slut does not have that right.”
Again, in our society some women are more vulnerable than others to both sexual assault and rape apologism. And though virtually any woman can be made to be seen as unrapeable, some women start out closer to that status already. Among the many factors that can make a woman unrapeable in the eyes of our society, including race, gender identity, and disability, is the willingness to behave sexually. “Sexual” women are automatically seen as less rapeable than “chaste” women — “bad girls” more unrapeable than “good” ones. And women who behave sexually in ways that are less culturally approved are more unrapeable still.
This inevitably influenced the decision here. Judges and prosecutors are not magically immune from thinking nasty things about “sluts” when most of the general public does the same, nor are they immune from thinking that a fantasy about group sex makes a woman a dirty, dirty slut when this misogynistic notion is culturally ingrained.
The very official reason behind this decision seems to be “she openly fantasized about doing it, and thus she likely consented when the opportunity was presented to her” — and that assumption is a problem of proportions so enormous it’s impossible to overstate. But the prejudice behind that reason is “look what as slut she is, thinking about group sex with several men — how could a slut like that have possibly said no?” And that? That is an epically huge problem, too.
Jan
14
Swedish Court Decides Sexual Assault is Not a Crime
Filed Under Europe, International, bigotry, courts, misogyny, patriarchy, rape and sexual assault, sexual exploitation and harassment, violence against women and girls | 13 Comments
Trigger Warning for descriptions of sexual assault, apologism, and victim-blaming
At a New Year’s party in Sweden, a 17-year-old girl laid down to sleep on a sofa. The 49-year-old father of the boy hosting the party proceeded to lift up her skirt while she was unconscious and photograph her genitals. He then, in some unspecified manner, spread the photo to other people.
The victim pressed charges, once she learned of what had been done to her. Then, the court dismissed the charges — not because they found that there was insufficient evidence, or because the victim changed her mind about pursuing the case, but because they said that lifting an unconscious person’s skirt without her consent and photographing her genitals, also without her consent, is not against the law.
A court in Halmstad on the southwest coast of Sweden has dismissed charges against a man who reportedly took a photo of a 17-year-old girl’s genitals while she was sleeping. The court said that the incident was was not a punishable offense.
…
Citing several other cases, the Halmstad district court said that the man had not committed a crime. There is no general prohibition against photographing people without their consent. The same applies to people who are asleep.
The fact that other people have seen the photograph, as claimed by the prosecutor in this case, doesn’t make the incident a punishable offense either, according to the court.
What we’re looking at here is a legal system which has absolutely no respect for women’s bodily autonomy — a legal system that says “so long as she’s there, you can do whatever you want with her.”
Nov
24
U.S. Sailor Acquitted of Rape, Despite Admission of Physical Force
Filed Under Australia, International, courts, misogyny, patriarchy, rape and sexual assault, sex work, violence against women and girls | 21 Comments
Trigger Warning for rape apologism and graphic descriptions of sexual violence
In Sydney, a U.S. sailor has been acquitted on charges of raping a sex worker who told him to stop — even though he admitted, in court, to using a “lock down maneuver” to pin her to the bed.
A New South Wales District Court jury cleared Petty Officer Timothy Davis, 25, of a charge of sexual intercourse without consent, with the aggravating factor of causing the woman actual bodily harm. The charge carries a sentence of up to 20 years in prison.
Davis was one of 3,000 Marines and Navy personnel on shore leave in Sydney after the amphibious assault ship USS Peleliu and guided missile destroyer USS Halsey arrived in the port in October, 2008.
The woman told the court she had protected, consensual sex with Davis at the brothel where she worked, but said he became aggressive when she told him his time was up and forced her to have unprotected sex. The jury was shown police photographs of scratches on the woman.
Davis denied forcing the woman to have sex, but admitted in court that he used a “lock down maneuver” to pin her to the bed when she said she wanted to stop. He told the court he backed off when she kicked him, though he said he muffled her mouth with his hand when she began to scream after he demanded his money back.
Could we possibly be reading this correctly? Let’s try another source:
She said he “ripped” off his condom, telling her he had paid for sex and he was going to finish it off “like a real man”.
The slight woman said he pushed her head into the pillow, started suffocating her, and had unprotected sex for 30 seconds.
The jury was shown police photos depicting scratches on the woman, who described Petty Officer Davis as an “animal” during an angry outburst at the trial.
In his evidence, the sailor – who agreed his weight was more than double the woman’s – admitted using a “lock down manoeuvre” to pin her down to the bed when she said she wanted to stop.
He said he told her he was going to “finish”, but when she kicked him away, he backed off with his hands in the air.
So, she told him to stop. And even only as far as he admits, instead of stopping as he was told, he pinned her to the bed and told her he was going to continue anyway. I repeat: against her wishes. After she told him to stop.
Which means that as far as any reasonable definition goes — hell, even working off an antiquated and misogynistic definition of rape that requires physical violence to be present — he confessed to raping her.
Nov
20
Transgender Day of Remembrance 2009
Filed Under International, bigotry, human rights, trans, transphobia and trans misogyny, violence against women and girls | 5 Comments
Today is the Eleventh Annual Transgender Day of Remembrance. Today is a day to remember the transgender people (or people perceived by their killers to be trans) who have died as a result of hatred and violence, and as a result of the hateful and violent cultures that support the perpetrators. Today is a day to remember those whose deaths authorities and media attempt to sweep under the rug, whose identities are devalued and erased once they are gone, whose murders usually go unsolved. Today is a day to read their names, and not forget.Here is a list of the 162 known trans people who were killed from November 20, 2008 to November 12, 2009. Most were women. Most were black or Latina. A disproportionate number were sex workers. Several were still only teenagers.
Many of the people listed have had their names, ages, and/or locations recorded; for others, we only know the details of their murders. More still are not listed here at all, because their deaths and the reasons behind them are still unknown to anyone outside of their closest friends and family.
Whoever they were, wherever they were from, and whatever we know or do not know about them, they all need to be remembered, and they need to be remembered equally — along with the reasons why they aren’t here anymore.
Further Reading:
What Does Transgender Day of Remembrance Mean to You? by Monica at Transgriot
International Transgender Day of Remembrance 2009 by kaninchenzero at FWD/Forward
International Transgender Day of Remembrance, 20th November 2009 by Helen G at bird of paradox
the drowned and the saved by Queen Emily at Questioning Transphobia
TDOR 2009 by Chally at Zero at the Bone
Events are being held today in many nations and cities all over the world. Find out if there is one near you.
cross-posted at Feministe
Nov
16
Man Allegedly Murdered Albanian Woman Because She Was Trans
Filed Under Europe, International, bigotry, courts, misogyny, patriarchy, trans, transphobia and trans misogyny, violence against women and girls | 1 Comment
Trigger Warning for transmisogyny and discussions of violence against women
In September, Kristina Muça was brutally murdered in Tirana, Albania. Her neck was slit, allegedly by a man she had only just met. The alleged motives for the crime were, according to prosecutors and to defendant Sefedin Hoxha’s now recanted confession, transphobic hatred towards the victim.
I’ve learned of this story through reader Kim Burton, who translated the local media reports into English and forwarded them to me, among others. She has verified the translations with a colleague and friend. All links in this post are to google documents of Kim’s translations, with the links to the original articles at the bottom of each. Please note that she has translated them faithfully, including the extremely disrespectful and ungendering language that so regularly accompanies reports on violence against trans people, and use caution when clicking through. The reports generally refer to Kristina as a “man,” “homosexual” or “transvestite,” complete with use of an incorrect name, though her boyfriend has strongly indicated that Kirstina identified as a woman, and prosecutors seem to be referring to her correctly. In the sections I have copied into the post, I have redacted Kristina’s male name, changed the pronouns, and altered or deleted some other disrespectful language when not used in direct quotes or noted otherwise by me. The original documents, however, are unchanged.
Oct
26
Lawyer Claims Rapist “Misread the Situation”
Filed Under Europe, International, courts, misogyny, patriarchy, rape and sexual assault, violence against women and girls | 11 Comments
In Scotland, a man was convicted of raping a woman who fell asleep on his couch. She was unconscious throughout the assault, and woke to find herself partially undressed. Craig Byars admitted to the rape and has been sentenced to four years in jail.
But in spite of that confession, his lawyer is still making excuses — assuring us of what a good guy Byars really is, and that raping a sleeping woman is the kind of thing that can happen to the best of us!
Defence counsel Shahid Latif said Byars apologised for the consequences of his actions on the victim.
He said: “I have to stress that what happened was a gross error of judgement on his part. He misread the situation.”
He misread the situation.
The tendency for defenses of a rapist to continue even after he has been convicted or has confessed is something that gets under my skin at the best of times. There is seemingly a compulsive desire by every rapist and those close to him to ensure that the world knows he’s actually a good person. First of all, whether or not he’s a “good person” is incredibly irrelevant to the subject of whether or not he raped someone. Secondly, as we live in a world where only bad, bad men, evil, slimy subhuman creatures, are considered to be capable of raping, the insistence that raping someone was out of character for this particular rapist, a simple mistake, an error in judgment, seems to me to be the same thing as saying “yes, so he raped a woman this one time! But that doesn’t make him a real rapist.”
But this specific defense strikes me as a particularly awful and apologist way of making an already awful and apologist argument.
Oct
3
Edmonton Teacher Fired Over His Gender Identity
Filed Under International, LGBTQ, bigotry, discrimination, education and schools, gender, human rights, trans, transphobia and trans misogyny, work | 8 Comments
A trans man who worked as a substitute teacher in Edmonton, Alberta was fired by a Catholic school upon telling them about his plans to transition:
Jan Buterman is praised in a letter of dismissal for his teaching abilities, but told his gender change from woman to man is not aligned with the teachings of the Catholic church or its values.
The letter says the teacher would confuse students and their parents.
“I am horrified that this would happen to anybody,” said Buterman, 39, who taught social studies, German and French to students in Grades 7 to 12 in the well-to-do bedroom community of St. Albert north of Edmonton.
“I don’t think that someone’s medical condition is really fodder for your employer. It should not be any of their business. I respect people’s beliefs, I do. That doesn’t mean they get to ignore the laws we have around equality.”
Officials with the Greater St. Albert Catholic School Board were not available for comment.
The letter suggests that board officials consulted with Catholic church leaders before telling Buterman that he was being removed from the list of substitute teachers on Oct. 9, 2008. Buterman filed the complaint Thursday before the time limit on filing ran out.
“The reason for removing you from the substitute teacher list follows a conversation we shared in which you indicated that you had been diagnosed with a gender identity medical condition and that you were undergoing physical gender changes from the female gender to the male gender,” wrote Steve Bayus, deputy superintendent of schools.
“In discussions with the Archbishop of the Edmonton Diocese, the teaching of the Catholic church is that persons cannot change their gender. One’s gender is considered what God created it to be.”
Oct
1
Teacher Groomed 13-Year-Old Girl Through the Internet, Raped Her
Filed Under Europe, International, assholes, courts, education and schools, misogyny, patriarchy, rape and sexual assault, violence against women and girls | 14 Comments
This case is appalling on multiple levels. In the UK, 24-year-old man — a man who worked as a teacher — groomed a 13-year-old girl through the internet using a 15-year-old female alter ego, and then met her in person and raped her.
After Matthew Knott raped her, the girl reported the attack, and he has since been convicted on charges of grooming a child for sex on the internet and having sexual activity with a child (read: rape, because consensual sex with a child is impossible). I see no real reason to reproduce the details of the grooming and assault here; you can click through to read about the ways in which Knott manipulated the girl, and how he assaulted her not only through a lack of meaningful consent due to her age (more than enough), but also by obtaining her compliance through ordering her around in a threatening manner. He was sentenced to four years in prison, and is barred from working with children for five years.
Again, there are multiple levels of outrage here. There’s the fact that Knott committed this assault in the first place. Then there’s the fact that he did so as a teacher, someone who is entrusted with the well-being of children and adolescents every day, even if his victim was not one of his students. Further, there’s his mere sentence of four years in prison, which seems a bit short to me, though I suppose that it is in fact much longer than most rapists ever receive. And there’s the sickening knowledge that he will be able to legally work with children again in five years — I assume that means one year after his release? — even though he has raped a 13-year-old, and the school at which he taught at the time of the rape is for students age 11 through 16. One can only hope that no one would be so foolish as to hire him for a position that involves working with children, and certainly not for a teaching job.
Oh, wait, and then there’s this comment from the judge:
Judge Michael Henshaw told him: “It is perfectly clear to anybody here and those reading about these offences to see these were carefully planned calculated offences carried out in a devious way to enable you to meet this child for the purpose of having sex with her.
“The type of activity you engaged in is of enormous public concern.
“Parents throughout this country are no doubt worried sick what their offspring might be doing when they are using the computer.
“There are people like you who adopt identities to encourage children to commit offences.”
Yes, yes, mhm, agreed … what?
I keep trying to read that line another way. Maybe he meant “there are people like you who adopt identities in order to commit offenses through encouraging children”? Maybe, but that’s not what he says. Either way you read it, no matter how generously, the judge here frames grooming a child for sexual assault as “encouragement,” when in fact those two things are worlds apart. That is a big problem. And the way I’m reading it, he also frames the child who has been raped as having committed an offense.
No. No, no, no. Pretending to be a teenager and then telling an actual teen that they ought to go egg someone’s house is adopting an identity to encourage children to commit offenses. Pretending to be a teenager in order to obtain explicit photographs of an actual teen, and then to get her to meet you in order to rape her, is not encouraging children to commit offenses. It is victimizing a child, it is committing an offense, and the suggestion that the child has somehow been corrupted or merely been subject to a bad influence by someone who ought to know better is frankly disgusting.
Treating the rape of a child as just “having sex” that general society finds icky is a huge and pervasive problem. Pretending that grooming children is the same as seduction is a similar problem. And acting as though teenage sex is something just as fearsome, just as valid for parents to be concerned about as an adult raping a teenager, is something that regularly keeps victims marginalized and blaming themselves, and something which only encourages rapists — those like Matthew Knott.
Aug
22
Bill in the Bahamas Attempts to Outlaw Spousal Rape
Filed Under International, feminism, human rights, legislation, misogyny, patriarchy, rape and sexual assault, violence against women and girls | 4 Comments
Until the 1970s, spousal rape (or marital rape) was legal in most of the United States. It wasn’t until 1993 that the last U.S. state (North Carolina) made spousal rape a crime, and there are still numerous states that treat spousal rape as a lesser crime than rape committed by anyone else. Given this history and these current attitudes in a country that is often portrayed as some kind of bastion of women’s rights, it’s wholly unsurprising that many women around the world are still fighting for their right to not be legally raped by their husbands.
One such place where women do not currently have the right to bodily autonomy in marriage is the Bahamas. And women attempting to reform the law are sadly and predictably facing steep opposition:
The bill, which is designed to outlaw marital rape, was tabled in the House of Assembly last month.
However, many Bahamian men, like taxi driver Pemmie Sutherland, say the bill is “simply unnecessary.”
“It is ridiculous for them to try to make that a law, because I don’t think a man can rape his own wife. After two people get married, the Bible says that they become one – one flesh. How is it possible to rape what is yours?” asked Mr. Sutherland.
Elvis Russell told the Journal that he does not support the bill either because there is no such thing as rape within a marriage.
“Even if a woman says no to her husband it still can’t be considered rape because she is his wife. He already paid his dues at the church and she already said ‘I do,’ so from then on, even if [a man] forces sex on his wife, it isn’t rape,” he said.
The article then continues by reminding us that misogyny and patriarchy upholding are not the sole domain of men, by quoting several women who oppose the law by expressing similar views to the ones above.
Aug
8
Greek Woman Allegedly Set Attacker’s Genitals on Fire
Filed Under Europe, International, assholes, courts, misogyny, patriarchy, rape and sexual assault, sexism, violence against women and girls | 31 Comments
A woman in Greece was out at a club. A man, a British tourist out at that same club, allegedly exposed his genitals and started waving them around and making obscene gestures and remarks. He then allegedly forcibly fondled the woman, including between her legs.
During the course of this alleged assault, the woman allegedly told him to stop harassing her, and when he did not, she poured her alcoholic beverage on him. When he still refused to stop harassing and assaulting her, she allegedly got out a lighter.
Stuart Feltham is in the hospital with second degree burns on his body, including his genitals. Marina Fanouraki is in court.
Fanouraki says that she did not light Feltham’s pants on fire, that she poured the liquid on him after he assaulted her, and he must have accidentally lit himself on fire while trying to light a cigarette. Feltham denies the sexual assault and harassment, with his parents defending him as a “kind-hearted, generous boy.”
I don’t know what actually happened. Neither do you. And there is so much to write about here — the common assault of Greek women by British tourists which has made Fanouraki a hometown hero, the government response that this is somehow a lesson about alcohol, and more.
But I do know what most people seem to believe happened. Most people seem to believe that Feltham harassed and assaulted Fanouraki, and that Fanouraki responded by pouring her drink on him, and lighting him on fire. I do know that most people believe that this is what has happened, and that Fanouraki is the only one who has been charged with a crime. (Note: Fanouraki’s lawyers apparently intend to take legal action against Feltham. But unless the court system is vastly different from the American one, I would assume that those would be civil rather than criminal charges.) I do know that most people believe that this is what happened, and are placing the blame entirely on one person. And it’s not the person who is alleged to have committed a sexual assault.
Time and time again, women who act in self-defense are charged with crimes while the man they were defending themselves against walks free and is treated as the victim. And the woman who defended herself is scolded and dismissed as overreacting, going to far, and being a crazy, vengeful bitch. The man, oh, he was wrong of course. But the woman — why the woman, she should have responded better! Why didn’t she more carefully analyze all of her options for protecting herself and choose the one that was the least forceful, regardless of expected effectiveness? Couldn’t she have just politely and quietly asked him to stop?
Jun
26
Russian Trans Woman Murdered By Her Boyfriend
Filed Under Europe, International, LGBTQ, bigotry, misogyny, patriarchy, trans, transphobia and trans misogyny, violence against women and girls | 10 Comments
Trigger WarningVia Womanist Musings, I’ve just learned the devastating news that yet another trans woman has been murdered in an apparent hate crime. (Note: because of transphobia in the article, I am not quoting directly from it. Please read at your own discretion.)
The woman’s name was Kamilla; the only English language report I’ve been able to find does not give her last name. She had been living with a boyfriend of two years, named Vladimir. When Vladimir asked asked Kamilla to marry him, she declined. Apparently believing that she could not have possibly turned him down for her stated reason of not being ready to wed, he started going through her things, and found letters addressed to her former name. Upon further invasions of her privacy, he learned that she was trans.
Then he shot her dead.
Vladimir also slit his own wrists after murdering Kamilla. Of course he is still alive, and is now thankfully facing murder charges.
The circumstantial evidence quite clearly indicates that Vladimir murdered Kamilla because of transphobic and transmisogynistic hatred. And so, in fact, does the physical evidence. In his suicide note, Vladimir stated that he killed Kamilla because of her “betrayal.”
That’s right. Vladimir saw Kamilla being the person she was as a “betrayal” to him. And because the lives of trans individuals, and of just all women period, are seen as so expendable, he decided that the perceived “betrayal” was enough reason to take her life.
In other words, he saw his own cis gender identity as so much more valid than Kamilla’s gender identity that he decided she didn’t have the right to live. Instead of accepting her as the woman that she was, had always been, and had always presented herself as to him, or in fact instead of just walking away from the relationship, he decided to shoot her. When he learned that she was trans instead of cis, he didn’t only fail to continue seeing her as a woman. He failed to continue seeing her as human. And then in a supposed “last act,” he tried to pin his own actions on her.
I absolutely dread to see what the trial will be like. I imagine that the “trans panic” defense exists in Russia, too, and particularly judging from Vladimir’s note, it will almost certainly be used if he pleads not guilty. But I can only hope that the judicial system will recognize what Vladimir willfully ignored in his act of hatred: that Kamilla’s life, like all of our lives, had value and worth. And I hope that the most justice that can possibly be done will be done.
Rest in peace, Kamilla.
Jun
19
64 Words for Aung San Suu Kyi
Filed Under International, action alert, feminism, human rights, violence against women and girls | 2 Comments
Aung San Suu Kyi is a Nobel Peace Prize laureate and pro-democracy leader from Burma. She is also currently a political prisoner. For her political activities, she had been under house arrest for several years — until this May, when she was put into prison:
She is currently facing trial in Burma. She was on arrested on May 14th and is now being held in Insein Prison, a prison notorious for its terrible conditions and horrific treatment of prisoners. Aung San Suu Kyi is being tried for breaking the terms of her house arrest, which forbids visitors, after an American man, John Yettaw, swam across Inya Lake and refused to leave her house. Her trial began on 18th May.
Aung San Suu Kyi has committed no crime, she is the victim of crime, yet is currently facing a sentence of 3-5 years. The United Nations has ruled that Aung San Suu Kyi’s detention is illegal under international law, and also under Burmese law. The United Nations Security Council has also told the dictatorship that they must release Aung San Suu Kyi.
Political prisoners in Burma are routinely subjected to torture and often denied medical treatment. There are serious concerns for Aung San Suu Kyi’s health in these conditions, particularly as she has recently been seriously ill.
Today is Aung San Suu Kyi’s 64th birthday. To mark the day, her supporters are asking everyone who knows that her detention is wrong to write a 64 word message to and/or about her. You can submit your 64 words to their website. Mine are below:
Dear Aung San Suu Kyi: we have not forgotten you.You’re one of the bravest women this world has ever known. I hope for a day when your illegal, immoral detention will end. And I look to the day when your people will be free, and when the world will follow in their footsteps. It will come, even if it’s long after we’re gone.
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“Men, their rights, and nothing more; women, their rights, and nothing less.” — Susan B. Anthony
