Sex is an essential part of life. It’s enjoyable, pleasurable, and necessary in relationships. As a result, you must learn everything you can about it in order to improve your quality of sex life.
You may well have experienced sexual stagnation if you’re already in a relationship for a long time. Breathe, you’re not the only one who’s going through this. Droughts are a natural part of even the strongest of relationships, and you shouldn’t feel guilty or ashamed if you’re going through one.
Throughout this post, I will provide you with some easy tips for resolving this issue, which will result in increased sex in a relationship and rekindled affection for one another, a mixture of relationship management and self-improvement is needed.
1: Quit Smoking
Smoking is a hard habit to quit, trust me, all my friends who smoke, think they can quit after finishing every cigarette, and those who successfully quit, told me it was the best decision they did, being able to quit smoking, is a mental toughness exercise, but if you want a better sex life, and I mean a noticeable shift in your libido, going as much as double, you have to do it.
Researchers have reported that smoking couples have twice the amount of sex as couples where only one of them smoked, smoking causes infertility, and men who smoke, either lose their interest in sex or have lackluster performance in the bedroom, even if you are in your twenties or thirties, the rule still applies.
Sexual performance is not just about the erection itself, it has a lot of bodily systems involved, as you grow older, your testosterone drops, and smoking becomes THE libido killer.
2: Quit Porn
Porn is the ultimate sedation for men, it is unlimited access to unlimited sexuality, porn does many things to the brain, including an unnaturally high release of dopamine, now, why is that a problem you may ask? Because everyday tasks start to seem boring, hard work seems harder than usual, and approaching girls or dating would send your mind into a danger zone state.
Porn is so addictive and so sedating, it robs men of their motivation to do things that would translate into making them good at sex, dating, the gym, etc.
The nail on the coffin for porn is that it distorts how you view sex in the first place, the girls, the setting, the positions, it sets completely unreal and damaging expectations, and your mind will associate porn with sex, thus making real sex, an uninteresting chore.
3: Boost Your Testosterone Level
Through a mixture of healthy habits, quitting drugs, tobacco, and porn, you get to have more time and more money to invest somewhere else, like a home gym, good nutritious food, and better-looking clothes that are fit for your own body.
If I had to go into more details though, I would say that your average non-lifting smoker, can easily double his testosterone level and see changes in his libido, skin, body, and mind very quickly.
Cold showers can be implemented, multivitamins also work, the better you take care of your body and mind, the more it rewards you, a simple 3 days a week full body program works wonders, don’t complicate the gym, even the most barebones minimalist programs work for beginners.
4: Reduce Anxiety
Sex is something to be experienced instinctually, you simply do it, worrying about how you’re doing it or stressing yourself out with questions, unnecessarily throws a wrench into the works.
Sex, is both emotional and physical, and when you’re too stressed out about it, your body, can’t get excited about sex, as it is too busy solving the anxiety you’re creating in yourself, in this situation, you simply have to get out of your own head, and let things work themselves out, this puts you at an instinctual primal level of thinking, and when it comes to sex, that’s the state you want to be in.
There are a lot of factors that can go into this, the fear of not doing well in bed, also known as “performance anxiety”, or if you have any insecurities based on your looks, worrying about dick size, all of this none sense filling your head, is what leads to bad performance, it is quite literally a self-fulfilling prophecy.
5: Improve Your Erectile Dysfunction
This one usually occurs with unhealthy men, we already covered smoking, since it is literally the worst thing you can do, but overweight people have this too, the fatter they get, the less testosterone, this is caused by a bodily function called “aromatase”, it is when your body converts testosterone into estrogen (the female hormone), this is responsible for erectile dysfunction as well as gynecomastia.
The rule is, the leaner you are, the healthier, the higher your sex drive is going to be, and the longer you can stay erect, if you already suffer from erectile dysfunction, consider adding exercise to your daily regimen, fixing your diet, and shedding off bad habits and extra pounds, this will boost your testosterone levels, make your erections last longer, and overall, this will make you more attractive to the other sex, as your body signals a higher testosterone level, also called “genetic expression”.
6: Foreplay Ideas
If you think that your dick has anything with making a girl orgasm, I have some news for you, it is literally all in her imagination, foreplay is damn near everything, from the way you touch her, your body heat, slight biting on the neck, use your imagination, this isn’t too hard to understand.
All men whether experienced or not can immediately imagine a few things when we speak about foreplay, foreplay should be 80% of your entire session, penetration is last if you get in a woman’s head, you can, and you will make her orgasm every single time.
Foreplay is where it’s at fellas, men are physical, women are emotional, use foreplay and flirting while at it to get in her head, no dick-swinging competition needed.
7: Try something new
The biggest sex mistake men make in long term relationships is falling into a routine, doing the same thing, same positions in the same order in the same place, and you are going to get away with this in the first few months because it is the honeymoon phase and your image is damn near perfect and you can do no wrong in the girl’s eyes.
But unless you keep the relationship emotionally stimulating, you will find yourself losing the girl, and eventually, things get dumped down to a level where neither of you is interested, this can be prevented by spicing up the sex, fantasies, for example, are more taboo than they should be, with certain clear limits, you and your partner can try out a lot of different kinks, maybe you can get to know if she has any fantasies she has not told you about Ever heard of the Kama Sutra? Well, if you haven’t, thank me later.
Sex is one of those many things where the less you think about the details, the better you will do, sex should be instinctual, natural, not programmed like a chore. If you only listen to your partner’s body and yours, you will do better, setting up a romantic mood, jazz music, or whatever genre you two listen to, candle lights, and foreplay, there is so much to experiment with, trust me, your girl will never forget it, because so little men actually bother to do it, or are too shy to propose their ideas on sex.